Prince Harry said Meghan Markle did not act on suicidal ideation because she did not want to hurt him
In candid conversation as part of their Apple TV + series The me you can’t seePrince Harry told Oprah his wife Meghan Markle the Duchess of Sussex had not acted on the suicidal thoughts she was experiencing during their son Archie’s pregnancy because she did not want to cause Harry more pain in his life.
“What kept her from seeing through was how unfair it would be to me after everything that had happened to my mother and now to be in a position to lose another woman in my life, with a baby inside of her, our baby, ”he said.
During their joint interview with Oprah in March, Meghan told Oprah that she had reached a breaking point. “I just didn’t see a solution. I would sit at night, and I was just like, ‘I don’t understand how all of this is produced’ – and again, I couldn’t see it – but it’s almost worse when you feel it through. the expression of my mother or my friends or them calling me crying like, “Meg, they are not protecting you”. And I realized it was all happening just because I was breathing.
Meghan admitted she was afraid to tell Harry because of her past losses. “Look, I was really ashamed to say it back then and ashamed to have to admit it, to Harry in particular, because I know how much he suffered,” she said. “But I knew if I didn’t say it, I would – and I just didn’t want to be alive anymore. And it was a very clear, real, scary constant thought.
As Harry says in The me you can’t see, “The scariest thing for her was her clarity of thought. She had not “lost” him. She wasn’t crazy. She was not self-mediating, either through pills or alcohol. She was absolutely sober. She was completely sane. Yet in the stillness of the night, these thoughts woke her up.
Meghan and Harry told Oprah in March the night they attended a Cirque du Soleil at the Royal Albert Hall on January 16, 2019. Meghan was six months pregnant. “I remember saying to him, ‘I don’t think you can go.’ And I said, ‘I can’t be left alone,’ ”Meghan told Oprah in March. “This image, if you zoom in, what I see is how tight his knuckles are around mine. You can see the white of our knuckles, because we’re smiling and doing our job, but we’re both trying to hold on.
Harry revealed that he regretted the way he had handled this situation.
“I’m a little ashamed of the way I handled it,” he says in the docu-series. “And of course, because of the system we were in and the responsibilities and duties we had, we had a quick hug and then we had to change and we had to jump into a convoy with a police escort and drive. at the Royal Albert Hall for a charity event, then step out into a camera wall and pretend everything is fine. There was no option to say, “You know what? Tonight we will not go. Because you just have to imagine the stories that flow from it.
“While my wife and I were in these chairs, shaking hands, as the lights go out, Meghan starts to cry. I’m sorry for her, but I’m also really mad at myself that we’re stuck in this situation, “Harry said.” I was ashamed it had deteriorated to this point. I was ashamed to go to my family. Because to be honest with you, like a lot of other people my age that my age could probably relate to, I know I’m not going to get what I need from my family.
Meghan told Oprah in March that she actually visited someone at the palace but was turned down. “I went to the institution and said I had to go somewhere to get help, I said I had never felt this way before and I had to go somewhere, and they said I couldn’t, that it wouldn’t be good for the institution. ”
Ultimately, Meghan told Oprah, she spoke publicly about the situation in order to help others cope with their own mental health issues. “I share this because there are so many people who are afraid to speak out that they need help,” she said. “And I personally know how hard it is to – not only is it hard, but when your voice is silenced, to be told no… It was emails, asking for help, saying very specifically. that I am concerned about my mental well-being… Nothing was ever Ended. So we had to find a solution.
If you or someone you know is at risk, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text HOME at 741741 to message a crisis counselor from home. Crisis Text Line for free.
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